Blenderz, I don't have words today. I'm not okay. Not one bit.

My dog Curium became the victim of a hit and run. He was struck by a vehicle yesterday afternoon. He did not make it.

I'm sorry to make a bombshell announcement like this and ruin everything. Again. My brain is scrambled. Nothing makes sense. I feel like I'm dying inside.

I don't know what or how to say things like this. To think I had such positive thoughts yesterday feels so stupid now. Like life played one big cruel joke on me.

My dogs are my world and I am Beyond Devasted. There are not enough tears. I ran out.

I feel horrible having to write this and deliver such tragedy. It all feels too familiar. The nightmare I can't escape. I'm angry. I'm sickened. I'm sad. I'm numb. I hate this. I'm really not okay.

But you all are part of my life and his. So I needed to let you know.

I think I'm going to try and be here if you guys don't mind. I don't think (know?) if a break is the best thing for me. I feel like isolating would make things worse, but also don't want to be this dark cloud that's ruining the check-in.

I guess I really don't know anything anymore right now. My heart is broken.

I'm sorry.

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