I'm posting here because the thoughts in my head are awfully loud and I can't think of another place to just get it all out. It's even okay if no one responds! ;)
I've always had a very loud voice in my head saying you're too chubby, you eat too much, if you eat/drink that, you're going to have to run an extra mile...and so, I became totally addicted to marathon running (completed somewhere between 25-30 full, avg time about 3:50). I've never been "skinny" but I am pretty fit and really loved the feeling of a long run. Especially because marathon training tended to make my clothes looser and it helped to silence the calorie counter in my head. If I ran 10- 20 miles, I wouldn't have to worry much. But, I eat well. Lots of fruits and veg, whole grains, some dessert yes and maybe a doughnut on the odd weekend but it feels like a good balance.
So, running was great, but I got bored, especially because this awful winter here in Maine sent me to the gym more often than usual. I started doing Burn Round 2 about 6 weeks ago and have moved on to Sweat, keeping in a short run every day, too, because I really love it. I am feeling stronger. My brain likes the variety. But my pants seem to be getting tighter. And the voice in my head is getting louder ... you're eating too much! You're not running enough! I went looking for new jeans and work clothes today and most things fit in the waist but nothing fit in the legs. I know the internet will tell me that I'm building muscle, and maybe that's true, but it's so hard to quiet the loudness in my head that loves to focus on numbers (pants size, miles run, calories in, calories out...).
I wrote this hoping the voice would shut up for a bit. If anyone read - well, thanks. This is such a great, positive community. Happy weekend everyone! I
Strong and Frustated
I'm posting here because the thoughts in my head are awfully loud and I can't think of another place to just get it all out. It's even okay if no one responds! ;)
I've always had a very loud voice in my head saying you're too chubby, you eat too much, if you eat/drink that, you're going to have to run an extra mile...and so, I became totally addicted to marathon running (completed somewhere between 25-30 full, avg time about 3:50). I've never been "skinny" but I am pretty fit and really loved the feeling of a long run. Especially because marathon training tended to make my clothes looser and it helped to silence the calorie counter in my head. If I ran 10- 20 miles, I wouldn't have to worry much. But, I eat well. Lots of fruits and veg, whole grains, some dessert yes and maybe a doughnut on the odd weekend but it feels like a good balance.
So, running was great, but I got bored, especially because this awful winter here in Maine sent me to the gym more often than usual. I started doing Burn Round 2 about 6 weeks ago and have moved on to Sweat, keeping in a short run every day, too, because I really love it. I am feeling stronger. My brain likes the variety. But my pants seem to be getting tighter. And the voice in my head is getting louder ... you're eating too much! You're not running enough! I went looking for new jeans and work clothes today and most things fit in the waist but nothing fit in the legs. I know the internet will tell me that I'm building muscle, and maybe that's true, but it's so hard to quiet the loudness in my head that loves to focus on numbers (pants size, miles run, calories in, calories out...).
I wrote this hoping the voice would shut up for a bit. If anyone read - well, thanks. This is such a great, positive community. Happy weekend everyone! I