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I hate my body, and my mentality is hard to deal with

So I suffer from anxiety and depression, and I've gained 20 kilos in a short span of time. I almost can't look myself in the mirror without getting a panic attack and crying, 'cause I hate everything about my body. It's covered in stretch marks, and I can't fit any clothes anymore. I've tried working out, but I have a hard time maintaining that and also eating healthy. I guess I need help; advice, support and someone with a similar story to encourage me. I feel selfish writing this, but I feel like I'm at an all-time low