Today was a very lazy Friday for me. It was actually really warm for March where I live and it was 57 degrees as a high! I spent some time outside and went out with my mom and got some almond butter. I tried it on my chocolate ice cream after dinner and it was great. But the my sister got it and she split it all over the place. I got very angry and started to yell at her for wasting it. I made it a big deal and I think I was just annoyed in general from not being able to do much and lying on the couch all day. I also was hard on myself about the waste I make involving food and packaging. I need to be more calm about this because I know that I'm doing the best I can with using little to no plastic and avoiding pre- packaged food. Food stress was okay.
Sometimes the voice is so loud. Like the ED, worry about waste and climate change are all yelling at me at volume 10 over everything else. They won’t stop and all the other things I care for like school, family, friends are at level 5 and can’t get through. Sometimes I wish I could just turn them off for one day and be normal. I can’t sleep because I’m worried about eating out tomorrow for lunch and thinking of skipping breakfast to save calories or that I have to avoid carbs because I’ll have some with lunch or I can eat this because it makes waste and I have to save my daily allotment for later. My mind can be too much sometimes. I wish I didn’t care so much about the waste and environment like others. It would be easier but I do care. I love this planet and need it.